10 Tips On How To Heal From Depression

I was at a function last week and the discussion turned to the emotional well being of today’s teenagers. Someone in the group mentioned that they knew of 5 teenagers that had taken their lives in the last year. Adding to that I mentioned how I was also invited to assist with a high school in northern NSW that had 10 students take their lives in the last 2 years.
The sad news is this isn’t confined to teenagers. Its seeping across the whole of society. We have more affluence than we have ever had access to in the history of humankind and yet we have such unbelievable levels of depression and suicide rates. I know that statement means carries little weight though. I know what its like to be deeply depressed and contemplating if life was worth living, and having access to affluence didn’t mean a thing to me. I recall being curled up in a ball on my bed, in a dark misery and self loathing, thinking of the option of not living through this. At one point I was trying to think of all the reasons why I should be happy to help get me out of this state. I had a multiple 6 figure salary, a secure job, a beautiful home, a stable family upbringing, good relationships and on paper an ideal lifestyle. Yet I was miserable. I was deeply depressed. I contemplated not living.
Depression can hit anyone. Young, old, rich, poor. You name it. And yeh, it’s brutal when it comes knocking. There are many factors that contribute to depression as presented here from the Lifeline web site:
* Relationship problems or conflict – e.g. separation/divorce, difficult/abusive relationship
* Job loss, especially long-term unemployment
* Loneliness or feeling isolated
* Excessive drug or alcohol use
* Having another family member who has depression
* Having a serious physical illness
* Changes in how the brain functions
* Personality factors – e.g. anxiety, low self-esteem
Ultimately the end result is that there are low levels of oxytocin and serotonin in the body which leads to a feeling of sadness, depression, emptiness and disconnectedness. The good news there is a way out of that dark abyss. Admittedly there is no magic pill (some doctors may think otherwise) but with a holistic approach there is every possibility that one could come out depression and live a lighter, happier existence. Here are some steps that I took that helped me find my way out of depression:
  1. Daily meditation. This plays a huge part in me feeling happier again. When you are stressed and anxious your body doesn’t produce the happy biochemicals of serotonin and oxytocin. It will produce cortisol, and adrenaline which cuts off your happy chemicals. So the first step is to start finding ways to remove the stress response in the body and meditation will help enormously with that. You can use an app, online programs or ideally, find a qualified meditation teacher who will take you through the steps of learning to meditate.
  2. Regular exercise. This has been scientifically proven to change your biochemicals and increase your happy chemicals in your body. (Black Dog trial ) Not only is exercise good for the increase in happy biochemicals it also is a great release of stress which leads to calmer healthier body and better sleep.
  3. Yoga and stretching. Sitting in a chair most of the day and being stressed will tighten up the body and block the flow of energy through the body. Yoga and stretching will open up the body, calm the mind and realign the body back into a healthier space
  4. Avoid negative media and dark depressing movies and books. Where you attention goes it grows. So if we put our mind on negative depressing content, our mind and body will start to align with the energy of that.
  5. Get off technology and get into nature. Shutting down our phones, iPads, laptops and nature bathing is a powerful way to elevate your energy. When we are in forests, oceans, meadows…anywhere in fresh air and in the simplicity of nature, we start to sync into that local environment which will leave you elevated and enlivened.
  6. Get some natural supplements into you. The American Agriculture Association admitted that there is 60% less minerals and nutrients in our fruit and vegetables than in the 1960’s due to the amount of over farming in the last few decades. Not only that, society in general is eating less fruit and vegetables and more processed food. Boosting your food with supplements with vitamins, minerals and herbs can make a big difference to your moods. For professional advice on this seek out a naturopath in your local village or even try online.
  7. Speaking of foods, stick with more locally grown fruit and vegetables from your growers market, and eat plenty of clean organic live food possible. Avoid greasy fatty foods, processed foods, gluten, caffeine, alcohol and refined sugars where possible.
  8. Sleep! Sounds sensible however we are now sleeping on average less than we ever have. Sleep plays such an important role in healing your mind and body from the stress response and increasing your feeling of wellbeing. I’m all for the afternoon nap just for 20 mins also if you can fit one in.
  9. Open Up To Family and Friends. You may feel like withdrawing from the world, but it’s those precious relationships that make all the difference. When you share your vulnerability and connect, it deepens the bond with them and builds love. There are people in your life that care unconditionally for you. Reach out and let them in. (By the way, it’s been proven that hugs increasing serotonin and oxytocin)
  10. Be active. Sitting in a dark room or curling under your doona all day is what you might feel like doing but it’s not going to help you. Get up and get active. Start doing things. Buy some plants and plant them around your suburb. Volunteer at a local charity. Walk someone’s dog. Go to the zoo. Join your local library and read a book. Find a meetup group and join it. Mow someone’s lawn. There are plenty of things we can do each day that will help you lift out of that dark night and move forward.
Depression can not only take control of your life, but it can also affect many people around you. We can heal from depression, but it will require some action. Doing the same thing over and over again won’t bring about a different result. Keep trying new things, see what works for you. If you are suffering depression, it is recommended that you seek professional help. Have someone to talk with. There are many support facilities around the world that are there to help you through this. You don’t need to do this on your own so please reach out to someone for help.

 

Tom is a meditation teacher, author, corporate speaker and personal coach. He provides one on one coaching as well as group coaching in his Zen Academy for Transformational Leadership. To contact Tom about receiving his guidance or booking him to speak at your company click here.

How To Be An Inspiring Leader In A Turbulent World

Ken Blanchard, the successful author of over 60 books once said…

“The key to successful leadership today is influence, not authority.”

We are in changing times…

I’ve been invited to present a number of talks lately in the corporate sector, on leadership.

It seems this is a big theme of late as we are entering a very interesting time as the status quo in all areas of life is being disrupted on a daily basis and company leaders are having to keep up with the pace.

We are seeing the shared business model such as Uber and AirBnB challenge long standing business of taxis and hotels.

We have Ai and robotics which are going to potentially disrupt the employment sector, and then…

We have social media where everything is reported and very little passes public scrutiny.

Companies and their leaders are more accountable than ever before. A tweet, a Tripadvisor post, a Facebook rant can bring an entire company down very quickly.

So what does it take to be a leader in today’s world?

When I was asked to do a talk on leadership I researched some of the top leaders in the world today to see what they were doing and how they were doing it. Surprisingly the number 1 leader in a list of 50 inspiring leaders was a man that I had never heard of before! Theo Epstein.

Who is Theo Epstein?

  • He was the youngest coach of a Major League baseball team at the age of 28 when he was signed to the Boston Red Sox.
  • Within 2 years of his signing he took them to win the World Series for the first time in 86 years.
  • Not long after that, he was poached by the Chicago Cubs where he went on to win the World Series for them for the first time in 108 years!

How did this young man have so much influence over a team of players that inspired them to do something no other coach had done in 86 and 108 years?

Maybe this quote from him had something to do with it?

“When people do things they weren’t even sure they were capable of, I think it comes back to connection. Connection with teammates. Connection with organisation. Feeling like they belong in the environment.”

Theo Epstein brought together his teams and inspired them to reach new levels of capability that were always there, only it took Epstein to bring them out.

Famed musician Quincy Jones said…

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”

This is a new era of Leadership! We can no longer rule with brute force or authority. It’s a time where our leaders lead with inspiration and influence.

What makes this challenging is fallibility!

No matter how high up someone might be as a leader, they still have fallibility. Which means they will…

…screw up

…make mistakes

…do something wrong

AND it will potentially be highlighted.

Our expectation of leaders is getting higher and higher which is a good thing, as it means we ideally should be getting better leaders, but it also puts immense pressure on our leaders to meet this high standard. And it comes at a price.

There are many days where I have beaten myself up for not reaching the level of standard that I and others set for myself.

I’ve made many mistakes along the way, and after pulling myself out of the dark night I look to improve and grow from the situation.

But often it’s a slow process.

So how can leaders progress during this time of intense scrutiny and pressure?

Being vulnerable and coachable is key.

Leaders need to be open to learning and growing. To do this they need to embrace criticism and adapt accordingly.

After each of our retreats we send out a survey to our attendees asking them how we can improve what we do? I also have a fortnightly coach that is there to help me see what I can’t see and inspire me to be a better version of myself.

I believe a leader also is able to be led…A teacher is always a student.

So what are some qualities that you would seek in a leader?

Here are 12 traits that I feel as a leader we should aspire to:

  1. Vulnerable
  2. Kind
  3. Calm
  4. Consistent
  5. Focused
  6. Polite
  7. Compassionate
  8. Strong
  9. Flexible
  10. Integrity
  11. Coachable
  12. Friendly

In some way shape or form, we are all leaders. We all have a sphere of influence, whether it’s with friends, colleagues, family or clients.

It’s not about putting people on pedestals but acknowledging the leader within each and every one of us. As Tim Ferris once said:

“The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion.”

_____________________
Learn to become a conscious leader and transform yourself and those around you with personal guidance from the Founder of The Stillness Project, Tom Cronin.
This program will stretch you, expand your potential, deepen your gifts to the world, and explore ways in which you can bring your vision, mission and purpose to life. Click here to speak with Tom about your Vision, Mission And Purpose. Be a Leader at the highest level
zen academy

How To Create A Life Of Purpose

Crawling out of bed each day to face another day at work feeling bored, lacking vitality and meaning in your life is not the greatest way to start your day. If this is you, then it’s time to discover your purpose in life. Anthony Robbins says that humans have 6 major needs.
1. Certainty
2. Uncertainty
3. Love/Connection
4. Growth
5. Significance
And lastly, one that often left out, is Contribution. When we feel we are contributing in some way to the world being a better place, we feel more energised, motivated and inspired in our lives. I know this all too well having spent many years in finance with the sole goal of making a shit load of money. It wasn’t until I felt completely unmotivated, depressed and stressed in the process of trying to do this that I discovered this wasn’t the way to live my life.

For many people it can be daunting trying to take those first steps to finding a purpose in life. They have such big goals that can take many years to realise and so often will give up. In this short clip I share some simple ways to add more purpose in your life and make this a fun and simpler process.

Check it out here…

        __________________________________

The Empowerment Series consists of 3 one hour power-packed audios on Finding Love, Manifesting Abundance and Discovering Your Life Purpose. You will not only receive the three downloadable audios, but also get the ebook versions and a companion book to capture those big nuggets of gold that will transform your life.

The Empowerment Series has been empowering and elevating people all over the world with comments like Susana who said:

“I wanted to express my gratitude to you as you have open a door to something I have been trying to reach for a long time: Myself, my inner strength. Your empowerment series talked straight to my heart and inspired me to be love. So thank you, thank you, thank you for all your hard work and for putting all that knowledge in such a beautiful and simple way.”

And then Joseph D said “The possibility of loving yourself unconditionally, creating abundance and understanding your life purpose has been brought to life through the empowerment series. Congratulations Tom, the world needs to hear this.”
Click here to get The Empowerment Series

Empowerment Banner

Empowerment Orange Button

10 Tips On How To Stop Your Partner Leaving You

coupleI worked for my previous employer for 26 years. Yup! One company for 26 years! Insane or smart, it’s open to discussion.

Now that might seem ridiculous but most of my colleagues there were also employees for 20-25 years. We are talking about a money broker (like stock broker) company that employed young staff straight out of uni and even some straight out of school. So how did a company in finance manage to keep its staff for so long? What kept us from leaving to go somewhere else?

I believe they had a philosophy that should not only be embraced by companies all over the world, but also translate to personal relationships.

Recently I had a coaching client come to me in a state of disarray. He ran a real estate business and he had just had 6 staff members leave his company to go to another company. He couldn’t believe it, he was shattered. Partly because his revenues took a hammering and partly because his ego took a hammering. I asked him, “Were you offering them the BEST option available in the industry?” He looked at me dumbfounded.

“What do you mean?” He asked.

“Well, if your place of employment offered the best option for anyone wanting to be in real estate, then they would have no option but to stay with you. There would be nowhere else to go. They obviously left for one reason only, there was a better option.”

I have to give it to ICAP, my previous employer. They knew:
1. That their bottom line was a result of good staff.
2. You need to keep good staff.

It’s a simple formula. It’s really not complicated. So they did everything they could to keep their staff. Here are some of the added incentives this company laid out for us:
– A full time chef who made us breakfast and lunch
– Shower facilities with fresh white fluffy towels every day
– Personal trainers twice a week
– Team building weekends away
– Partner dinners for our extended family
– A family Christmas day for client and staff families
– A percentage share in profits paid to us quarterly in bonuses

Yes other companies approached us all the time. And when you sit down with that ‘other’ company and discuss what they are offering, you weigh up not only the benefits that your existing company is offering you, but also the loyalty you feel to your company for their investment and goodwill in you. It became a no brainer, and why myself along with most other employees, stayed there for so long. My company simply was the best option…. full stop.

How can this translate to personal relationships? Ask yourself, “Am I the best option for this person?” Or, “Can they get a better ‘deal’ elsewhere?” Sounds very technical and businessy doesn’t it, but again it can be quite simple. If someone doesn’t want to be with you, ask yourself “Why don’t they want to be with me?” It might be that there is a miss alignment in values or differences in your lifestyles (people change and not always at the same rate). But it might be that you’re not offering them a very good deal. If that’s the case, what can you do to sweeten the deal? So rather than throwing in quarterly bonuses and some new fluffy white towels in the linen cupboard, here are some other ideas to help you be the best option for them:

1. Be kind and caring about their well-being
2. Be supportive in their life and encourage them with their goals
3. Contribute financially where possible
4. Openly communicative, so they don’t have to always second guess what you’re thinking
5. Bring lots of fun and laughter to their life
6. Inspire them with new knowledge that you are discovering in your own journey
7. Give them independence and personal freedom so they don’t feel caged
8. Contribute to the work load around the home
9. Be affectionate, passionate and tender
10. Be accepting of their flaws weakness and vulnerabilities

These are just some suggestions that could help you be the best available option for them. There will be plenty more and I’d love to hear any other suggestions that you might have so please leave them below. If they still want to go to another company or person when you feel you have offered the best option, then there are obviously other factors at play. But start by looking within and asking yourself if you are doing everything you can to be the best option for them.

_____________________________

Our retreats are a powerful way to not only restore balance to your mind and body, but also a way to get clear about your future. You will eat incredibly healthy food, meditate, do yoga, receive massages and get lots of much needed rest in peaceful locations. In amongst this you will do workshops and talks that will help you map out your future and learn techniques that will help you make this become a  reality. These mind mapping exercises will help you overcome deep limiting beliefs that hold you back from reaching your potential. Attendees in the past have said:

“I can honestly say that my time at the retreat was the most rewarding and insightful experience ever. It fed my heart, soul and spirit and has allowed me to move forward in my life with great positivity. I feel blessed and totally inspired. Meditation is now a priority in my daily life.” Caroline

“The words life changing, inspired, excited, blissful, are only a few of the words that come to mind. I feel lighter and more at peace than I can ever remember feeling. I am free. So amazingly, liberatingly free! Free of expectations and limitations. Free of my past. Free of negative emotions such as hurt, pain, anger, guilt. Free of fear which held me back, and free of that little voice inside my head which kept telling me I wasn’t good enough. Look out world, I’m finally free to be me, the truest, purest version of myself and that version is pretty Goddam amazing!” Sandra

Find out more by clicking here

stillness-retreats-footer

7 Things You Need To Know About Spiritual People That You Won’t Read In A Spiritual Book

spiritualMany years ago I started on this path of ‘waking up’ and ‘becoming spiritual’. I learnt to meditate, attended numerous courses, retreats, workshops and devoured hundreds of spiritual books! I looked up in awe to masters, saints, sages and swamis to guide me to the light. I was inspired by their perfection and tried so hard to get to ‘their level’. Each time I would fall and make a mistake, I would beat myself up and drop into a state self-loathing at my ‘badness’. I so wanted to be like these holy men and women- pure, light, eternally loving and unflawed. Yet in my quest I found that my humanness kept coming through and getting in the way. I would get frustrated, sad, and impatient at my slow progress.
 
As time went by I started to find the gaps between being a stressed, anxious, negative person and feeling light, calm and positive started to get wider and longer. I started teaching and when I was in front of students or writing a book or blog, words would seem to come through me that at first surprised me. I would be like: ”Whoa, where did that come from?” It was like there was me, AND something else that came through me. Over time I realised this pattern, that when there was enquiry from someone, I (that’s me the Egoic identity) would simply get out of the way and then the knowledge would flow through me from Source to goal. But still, when that wasn’t happening, there was me, the bloke, the guy, the everyday human.

I started spending more time with other teachers, sages and thought leaders, speaking at conferences, yoga events and even interviewing them and them interviewing me. As I ‘hung out’ and researched more about these people I realised something very profound. When they weren’t writing, teaching or responding in an interview they were very much like everyone else. They had many of the flaws I still had that I was beating myself up over. Some things I found out about them I was like “SERIOUSLY?? You too??”

I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or disappointed. I wanted to live in hope that I would reach their level of perfection only to now find that it didn’t exist. I learnt that no matter how holy and ‘spiritual’ these people were they had a number of traits that I would never read about in their books and lectures. I stopped beating myself up so much and acknowledged that I am human and yep, so are they. So here are 7 things about spiritual people that you won’t read in a spiritual book:

1. They get impatient: In an interview with one highly respected thought-leader and best selling author he showed a great deal of frustration over the internet not working very well and the interview taking longer than expected.
2. They argue: I recall Esther Hicks sharing how she and Jerry (her late husband) would argue over what floor boards they were putting in their home. Being ‘spiritually aware’ doesn’t mean you agree with everyone and everyone agrees with you.
3. They get cranky: Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, a great holy sage, stormed out of a 60 minute interview, throwing his microphone head piece down on the ground when challenged about buying land for a TM centre in Sydney.
4. They get moody: I spent some time with a leading spiritual guru to find that he would fluctuate from light and bubbly to sombre and very quiet.
5. They have desires: Yup, if they are in a body, then there are desires. It could be desire to eat, desire to sleep, desire to have intimacy, desire to be more enlightened. Either way, there are desires.
6. They have fears: One great sage I know still had fear and wanted to conquer it. He decided to do sky diving to over come it. I couldn’t wait to hear how it went. “How was it?” I asked. “It scared the shit out of me and I will never do that again!”
7. Other than the 11 breatharians on the planet (i.e. people who live on air alone) everyone else eats food. Because they eat food, they have waste that has to be eliminated. And guess what, that waste doesn’t smell like roses!

So if you are on the path of ‘waking up’ and exploring ‘spirituality’ go easy on yourself when you screw up or don’t feel all blissed and enlightened. It’s ok. It’s a process that just keeps going and going. There are infinite degrees of refinement and making mistakes is part of the process. If it’s uncomfortable, then that’s a gift, because feeling uncomfortable is Nature’s way of notifying you about change. Enjoy the ride, it’s what you came here for yeh?

_________________________________

The Empowerment Series consists of 3 one hour power-packed audios on Finding Love, Manifesting Abundance and Discovering Your Life Purpose. You will not only receive the three downloadable audios, but also get the ebook versions and a companion book to capture those big nuggets of gold that will transform your life.

The Empowerment Series has been empowering and elevating people all over the world with comments like Susana who said:

“I wanted to express my gratitude to you as you have open a door to something I have been trying to reach for a long time: Myself, my inner strength. Your empowerment series talked straight to my heart and inspired me to be love. So thank you, thank you, thank you for all your hard work and for putting all that knowledge in such a beautiful and simple way.”

And then Joseph D said “The possibility of loving yourself unconditionally, creating abundance and understanding your life purpose has been brought to life through the empowerment series. Congratulations Tom, the world needs to hear this.”
Click here to get The Empowerment Series

Empowerment Banner

Why I Teach My Teenage Children To Be Rebels

Taj and LaurenI have a dilemma. You see I have two 15 yr old children (yes twins!). Wait, no, having teenagers isn’t the dilemma, although for some people they may feel having teenagers is! ?

No my dilemma is that I inspire them to push the boundaries, break the rules, question authority and be rebels, yet at the same time to adhere to the structures of living in our home and fitting into the rules and regulations of school.

This is not an easy task as a parent.

Why do I inspire them to be rebels? Because deep down I believe boundaries are meant to be leapt over, and some rules are meant to be broken. If I don’t encourage them to leap over boundaries how are they going to thrive and excel in life when their conditioned mindset is to be part of the pack, stay safe and don’t challenge anything? How are they going to find their own identity and belief systems when the are moulded by a hierarchal corporate driven society?

Sure, there are rules in society that are there for a very good reason. But there are many rules that restrict the growth of society as a whole. When these rules get challenged there is tension and friction, as the ones who set the rules push back on the ones that want to break them.

The challenge is determining which rules will enhance society and which ones will diminish society. I teach my children that there is this law called ‘karma’ which tends to be a pretty good force in this process. Many times in my life I broke rules, was a rebel and stepped across boundary lines only to have karma slap me in some way loud and hard. It was painful and I learnt a big lesson that that rule WASN’T meant to be broken. Trying to navigate through this mine field is not an easy process and most of our learning is through trial and error or developing intuition.

My son is a very talented artist and he developed a great affinity for graffiti. So I said that we would explore abandoned buildings together and that he was allowed to do graffiti art only on buildings that were going to be torn down and it wouldn’t have a negative impact on peoples lives. He agreed to these terms. Yes we were bending the rules but there were some rules within that. This was all working out well and good until one day he stepped over that boundary line and did some graffiti where he wasn’t allowed to. The boys in blue didn’t take too kindly to this and …..KARMA!

But I didn’t let this deter him. Sure he suffered some consequences. Me, the police and karma itself let him know that there was a boundary line you simply DON’T cross there. But deep down there was a part of me that was like, yes, push that boundary, test it and find out what’s on the other side. It’s ok. You’re going to screw up sometimes, and yes, it won’t always work out. But don’t let one fail make you spend the rest of your life living in the safe zone and never take the leap.

Get to the edge and peer over it. If you feel “Hmmm, nup, this is not right.” then trust that feeling and pull back. But if you get to the edge, peer over and go “Yup, I’ve got this and I know it’s a safe landing” then take a huge leap! If no one ever did this then Aborigines would still not be allowed to vote, African-Americans would still be sitting in the back of the bus and gay people still would still not be allowed to get married. (Technically in Australia they still can’t get married but I am putting on my prophetic hat and intending this to change very soon!)

            _____________________________________________

Our monthly coaching sessions are becoming a huge hit around the world! Feel free to check out our Inner Sanctum monthly meditation coaching. It’s less than $1.90 a week! Our last session had a big response with attendees saying:
“Your description of deep transcendence brings me to tears.”
“Wow, Magnificent! Thank you Tom.”
“A brilliant focusing of the concepts developed through meditation.”
“I always feel so invigorated after these sessions, thank you Tom!”
You can find out more by clicking here.

Inner Sanctum Join Rect

The 4 Most Important Words That I Said To My Teenage Children

screen-shot-2016-11-07-at-9-14-25-am

I’ve been surprised lately that in 3 separate conversations where I shared that I had teenage twins, I received a response of “Oh you poor thing!” or “Far out that must be challenging.”
Yet it has not only been the most enjoyable period of my parenting life, but also the easiest!

So this made me ponder as to why my experience parenting teenagers is so far from other people’s expectations of what it would be like. Of course they are surrounded by lots of love and as parents we communicate to them how much we love them all the time. But I didn’t feel this was the only reason that parenting teenagers was easier than others expected.

Then it came to me…I realised it was 4 words that I constantly say to my children that has helped my parenting so much. I feel these 4 words help them feel empowered and they get to realise that in many respects, they are the creators of their life.

These 4 words were “It is your choice.”

Ok, so now you’re thinking “What? You just let them do what they want?”
No, definitely not. But we do let them know there is a natural law of cause and effect. Every action has a corresponding reaction, and it’s their choice as to what effect they want to cause.

So when you study and do well at school you receive accolades and good marks from the teacher plus lots of nice words and positive vibes from your parents. When you respond rudely to your parents or don’t do what we ask you to do, you lose your phone for a week (yes a HUGE pain point!) If you say something impolite or negative about a peer you receive in someway something negative back. When you do something good for someone, you receive something good back. I explained to my children that it’s a flow of energy. Good goes out, good comes back. Negative goes out, negative comes back. It’s all energy playing out in forms.

When we sit down together and go through examples of this they can clearly see how this works. They can see the sequence unfold in their lives everyday and it never misses a beat. So now they realise that they are the creators. They are empowered. They get to choose…negative or positive.

Of course, it’s not perfect. None of us are, but it sure has made a huge difference by empowering them to realise that it’s not US against THEM, rather them and the Universe playing together as energy. It’s a bit woo-woo I know but they get it over time 🙂


If you’d like to introduce meditation to your children’s life then you might like to try our new Teen meditation program called CHILL OUT MEDITATION. This is a world’s first teen meditation program based on ancient techniques and has been receiving huge responses from those teenagers using it. Find out more by clicking the button below.chillout

TSP_Learn More button

This One Thought Could Change the Entire Direction Of Your Life

screen-shot-2016-09-25-at-11-29-51-amYadbhavam Tat Bhavati….what we think we become.

I’m sure you often ponder the life you are living and if its where you want to be. Whether its your job, your relationships, the city you are living in or whether you are living a life of relevance or not. The big challenge for many of us is having a vision for where we want to be that is NOT determined by where we have BEEN. Yes, sounds confusing I know but stay with me.

The choices we make today (which determine our future) are usually influenced by the perception we have about ourselves. The perception of WHO WE ARE is usually determined by our past. For instance if you had a very negative upbringing with lots of abuse, then this becomes your story that you identify with. This previous experience now defines the perception of who you think you are. I’m this person or I’m that person based upon my previous life experiences. This then determines the decisions that you make which determines your future. So your future life is heavily influenced by your past.

This is why we keeping going round and round in circles reliving the same relationships, financial situations and careers over and over again because of this story we have inside our head about who we are and what level of worthiness we feel about ourselves.

How do we break this pattern? This is the exciting part! What if you had a perception about WHO YOU ARE based upon your FUTURE experiences and not your PAST experiences? For instance if you saw yourself in the future as a best-selling author, award winning film-maker, leading CEO of a company, in a loving harmonious relationship, living with affluence, founder of a charity, working in an orphanage, creating a globally successful app or whatever you imagine yourself doing, then this would change the decisions that you make today.

Think of this, the canvas of your future life is blank, and you get to fill it in with whatever you would like!! When you hold that vision firmly inside your head, then this redefines the perception that you have of yourself. This then redefines the decisions that you make and this defines your future. So your new future perception of yourself that you hold today, leads you to becoming this in the future! How cool is that? Yadbhavam tat bhavati.

The big challenge now is to not only continue to hold that firm vision of your future self but to even see it in the first place! This is where the Zen Academy for Transformational Leadership comes in. This is a 12 month coaching program where we help you find that BIG VISION of your future self, hold that vision, and then make it become REAL.

This is what some of our members have said about Zen Academy:

“Thank you Tom, this session has been awesome. I feel back on track, motivated and energised.”

“Hi Tom, firstly I want to say a huge thank you for your responses to my challenges last month!!! They were absolutely on point and have helped me get through the month and move forward!! THANK YOU!!!!”

“I feel I have re-gained my personal power, and will not be shoved around any more. Again thanks for your wisdom!!!!!!”

If you feel it’s time for you to redirect your life then lets chat about the Zen Academy by clicking here.

ZA Banners

This Buddhist Saying Changed My Life!

No doubt you are, or have been, through some difficult times in your life. Often when we pass through these times a common question is “Why me??” and we slip into a deep malaise and heaviness in life.

Well I can certainly relate. However when I came across a Buddhist saying all of that changed. I started to see my difficult times in a different light. I could see a  pattern forming where I would be in a difficult period of my life and I would seek more answers, I would go deeper with my meditation (in fact it was a difficult time that even lead me to meditation!), I would read more spiritual and self-help books, and I would seek guidance from teachers. Once I was able to recognise this pattern and see how it aligned to this Buddhist saying I related to those challenges very differently. Watch this video and I’ll explain it further…

 

ZA Banners

learn-more-button

10 Steps To Build Your Confidence

confidence

Are you looking for confidence builders that really work? Confidence is a tool that can help you to overcome obstacles and leave a lasting impression. And the best part about confidence is that it rubs off on others. When you’re confident about what you’re saying or doing, you’ll come off as intelligent, successful, capable and even desirable. Confident people have no trouble attracting others.

Of course, even people who are regularly confident experience spells of low self-esteem or insecurity. The important thing to remember is that if you find yourself feeling unusually down, it’s doesn’t take much to give your confidence level a boost.

The following confidence builders can help you stay steady and self-assured:

1.Peel yourself away from the mirror. Yes, you should devote some time each day to your appearance, but once you’re ready, let that be the end of it. Most of us have difficulty staying away from mirrors when we encounter them in elevators or bathrooms, but the less time you spend agonizing over every detail of your appearance, the happier you’ll be.

2.Stand behind your decisions. Instead of humming and hawing over miniscule decisions or jumping back and forth trying to decide what to do, try making a decision and going with it. This doesn’t mean you should start behaving rashly, but people who are confident and self-assured tend to know what they want.

3.Work on your posture. Your mom probably told you when you were a kid to stop slouching and she was right. When you stand tall, with your shoulders back and your head held high, the impression you

4.Stop comparing yourself to others. Don’t worry about anyone other than yourself. Who cares if your best friend is getting engaged or your neighbor just got a promotion at work?Dwelling on what others have achieved isn’t going to help you feel good about yourself, nor is it going to help you get ahead.

5.Do things alone. It’s easy to feel sure of yourself when you’re out with a group of people or a boyfriend or girlfriend. But doing things alone can leave you feeling outside of your comfort zone. Try doing things alone every now and then to cultivate your sense of confidence.

6. Practice meditation. By making your mind Still, you can filter out defeating thoughts which can contribute to low self-esteem. Twenty minutes twice a day can have a profound effect on your confidence.

7.Exchange online social networking for face-to-face social networking. Do you spend hours clicking through photos of your “friends,” analyzing their outfits or who they’ve been clicked with? Instead of wasting your time online, why not get out and socialize yourself? Putting yourself out there and meeting new people can help you to feel more confident about yourself.

8.Make eye contact. Confident people aren’t afraid to make eye contact. When you’re talking to someone, practice staring that person straight in the eyes. You’ll give off the impression that you’re sure of yourself, confident, and intelligent.

9.Dress your best. If you feel good in whatever you’re wearing, you’re more likely to convey that message to others, too. Instead of going out in your old pair of sweat pants, put some effort into your appearance each time you leave the house. You’ll find that spending just a few minutes on your outfit will help you to step out with confidence.

10.Feel wealthy. Take the time to remind yourself of all you have. You may not be the richest, the most successful, the prettiest or the smartest but isn’t it better to just be yourself? When you appreciate the blessings you do have and stop being in a state of wanting, you don’t need to feel down about what you don’t have.

If you would like some assistance with self-discipline then the Empowerment Series is for you! Here you will receive 3 x 1 hour audios on living a life of purpose, manifesting abundance, and finding love. You will also receive a companion book for notes and three ebook versions of the audios. Click here to find out more.

empowerment-seriesTSP_Learn More button