Letting Go Of Looking For Your Life Purpose

Summary:

There is so much emphasis on needing to know your life purpose lately, with seminars, conferences and Instagram posts talking about why you need to find your life purpose! Many clients come to me confused, frustrated and challenged that they don’t know what their purpose is and ask if I can help them ‘find their life purpose’.

In short…NO, I can’t. And the good news is if it hasn’t dawned on you what your purpose is yet, then just get on with living and take life day by day. That’s all you need to do. Keep it simple and let go of the idea that you might ever find your life purpose…just living is simply enough.

What’s Next?

  • My book that I co-wrote with Jacqui Fifer is now out! The Portal- How Meditation Can Save The World explores how meditation and mindfulness will unlock your power, grow your compassion for those around you and awaken your thirst for change. Sharing personal stories from six people who healed their lives through meditation as well as compelling insights from some of today’s most innovative thinkers, The Portal shares a powerful vision for humanity transformed. Order it now and get your bonuses here!
  • My fortnightly coaching group Zen Academy For Transformational Leadership is open for registration. Are you feeling compelled to be a zen leader in today’s complex world? Book your free consult here. 
  • BALI RETREAT! One of the most transformational experiences you will ever have. This 6-day yoga and meditation immersion will leave you feeling on a high and clear about the life you want and can live! Book here

How To Meditate When You Literally Dont Have Time To Meditate!

So a couple of weeks ago I wrote an article talking about how we often don’t make time to meditate because we have positioned something higher up as a preference than the deep fulfilment that comes from meditation. Usually it’s the case that we have the time to meditate but it’s just not as a high-priority as some of the other things that we are choosing to do. However there are circumstances where we literally will just not be able to find the time to meditate. Today I will share with you some tips and suggestions on how to meditate when you literally have no time to meditate. This was inspired by an inquiry I had from one of my students today, (thank you Beth) who has a newborn child and really is struggling to find time to meditate.

This is common now for many people as we take on more demands than ever before and there will be days where sitting in a chair and closing your eyes for 20 minutes to do a meditation may just not be possible. It is those days that we need to be adaptable and look at alternatives for a meditation practice.

Meditation doesn’t have to always be an eyes-closed, withdrawing-the-senses-from-the-outer-world experience. We can incorporate a meditation practice while we are driving the car, while we are pushing the trolley in the supermarket aisle, while we are preparing dinner, and while we are at kid’s sport. It just takes a little practice and a little tweaking on what our understanding of meditation is. Yes, sitting in a chair, closing our eyes and transcending deeply into the quiet inner world beyond thought and the senses is a very powerful and effective form of meditation. One that I highly recommend we do on a daily basis.

However being present in an eyes open state, and completely in this moment without the fluctuations of the mind traversing into the future and the past is also an effective meditation practice. Being present and mindful of being the embodiment of love in each moment regardless of your environment is also a meditation practice. Freedom from emotional fluctuations in the feeling body, experiencing the subtle and blissful state of Being is also a meditation.

This can all be done throughout your day regardless of how busy you are. So yes you might have a lot of things on, and you might have no time at all throughout your day to sit in a chair and close your eyes and dive deep into meditation, however that doesn’t mean that you’re unable to be blissfully present in each and every moment. That is your meditation on those days.

So here are some tips to meditate when there is no time to meditate:

  • In the shower, pick up the soap, smell it, assess what fragrance is in the soap, feel the warm drops on your skin, and have gratitude that you are able to shower with clean warm hygienic water. There are many people in the world right now that this is not possible.
  • While on the way to work, either on the public transport or while driving, take time out from listening to the radio or a podcast, don’t go on social media and don’t read the paper. All of that is mind wandering into other people’s thoughts. Sit and be present. Can you be there, and empty the mind of thoughts. This won’t be easy, but with practice you will have glimpses into a space with no thought, just Being present.
  • While at the supermarket, take in the sounds around you, what do you hear? Be aware of the smells around you, what do you smell? What do you feel on your skin, is it cold or warm in there? Come to your senses and just observe that.
  • When cooking dinner, prepare your meals with love and do it slowly. Be aware that the food you are preparing is to be consumed by you, your family or friends. Be mindful that the energy that you are preparing and cooking with will go into that food. Ask yourself am I the embodiment of love now?
  • Before bed, turn off your phone, turn off your wifi, turn off your TV and anything that is bright or noisy, and then sit at the foot of your bed on the floor. Just for a few minutes close your eyes, place your hands over your heart and repeat slowly five times: “I Am The Expression Of Love.”

So there you have some very simple suggestions to help you meditate when you have no time to meditate. Perhaps you have some suggestions that you might like to share with us? We’d love to hear them below!

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Our monthly meditation coaching sessions are becoming a huge hit around the world! Feel free to check out our Inner Sanctum monthly meditation coaching. It’s less than $1.90 a week! Our last session had a big response with attendees saying:
“Your description of deep transcendence brings me to tears.”
“Wow, Magnificent! Thank you Tom.”
“A brilliant focusing of the concepts developed through meditation.”
“I always feel so invigorated after these sessions, thank you Tom!”

How To Have The Perfect 2019!

It seemed that for many people, myself included, 2018 was a pretty intense year. The challenges flowed thick and fast! There were times when I was like “Ok, I’m ready for a break now…please ease off for a while!” Was this the case for you?

Well, my feeling is that 2019 is going to be a good year, the question is: will it be free of challenges? In short, NO. Challenges never stop all through our life. Ask anyone you know what their current challenge is and I’m sure they will find something. Then you think, well the Dalai Lama must have it pretty good? He has plenty of money, has accommodation with no debt, as much food as he wants, over 1 million Instagram followers and all the purple robes he ever needs. And yet he is always surrounded by bodyguards with assassination a constant threat, and he faces health issues just like everybody else, having recently spent 4 weeks in the Mayo Clinic for prostate problems. You will see him here supported by two monks holding him up and some firm looking bodyguards behind him.

It’s the nature of reality. As Dr John Demartini, the great thought leader suggests, we will always experience equal measure of support and challenge. Life will have pleasure and life will have pain. Where we struggle is that we have an expectation that if we try harder, get more money, look better, have more followers or manifest that dream boat, then we will finally be free and find peace and happiness. But there is no arrival. We never ‘get there’. What we can do is get better at not expecting to ‘get there’ and deal with the challenges as they appear. I was once told by my coach (yes I coach and get coached) that the challenges never stop, we just stop seeing them as challenges.

I liken it to the analogy of lifting weights which I may have mentioned to you before. If there was no gravitational pull on the dumb bell then there would be no challenge to the arm and therefore there would be no development of the muscle. So I actually pay my gym membership and go to the gym FOR the challenge. So what has all this got to do with making 2019 a great year? By letting go of it being perfect and letting go of it not having challenges we can be in flow more and less resistant to what is. Most of our stresses and anxieties stem from holding on so rigidly to what we think it should be rather than seeing it for what it is- an opportunity to let go and be. The wise do not seeking perfection in places that perfection does not exist. When I am stressed and in a state of mild overwhelm it’s always my reminder to let go and stop trying to control life and create perfection. When you think you have arrived, and you get those 1 million follows on your Insta, or you find that soul mate, or you finally pay off your mortgage, something will pop up to present a challenge. So yes, let’s make 2019 a great year and realise our goals, knowing full well, that when we do, it won’t be perfect and I’m perfectly happy with that.

Someone once said to me: “a rishi observes the fluctuations of life with a mild fascination and slight smile”. I guess this is one thing you can say about the Dalai Lama, throughout all of his challenges, he seems to always have that sweet smile on his face regardless.

Have a beautiful and perfectly imperfect 2019.

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Tom is a meditation teacher, author, corporate speaker and personal coach. He provides one on one coaching as well as group coaching in his Zen Academy for Transformational Leadership. To contact Tom about receiving his guidance or booking him to speak at your company click here.

The One Thing You Need To Do To Feel Fully Alive!

Norman Doidge, author of the Brain That Changed itself once said: “We must be learning if we are to feel fully alive.”

Our plasticity and changeability is one of our greatest gifts. We have this ability to grow and transform into something new all the time. Yet adding to this, Tim ferris once said: “People will choose unhappiness over uncertainty.” I know this feeling well! For 26 years I stayed in a job where I felt like a square peg in a round hole. The fear of leaving that certainty was greater than the quest to be happy. As the years went by I was becoming more disenchanted with my life and the work that I was doing. It showed up in my work as I became sloppy and made many mistakes. Management weren’t happy, I wasn’t happy and a spiral started to happen.

I felt trapped and didn’t know how to get out of there. We create these perceptions of who we are based upon our life experiences. I’d been a broker for more than half my life, what else could I possibly do?! I felt an inkling of what I wanted to do but certainly didn’t feel qualified or capable of doing it. You know when you get that mental loop going round and round in your head that is sabotaging your life? This was me! I kept hitting a glass ceiling then sabotaging everything by making poor choices that hurt me and other people. Years went by with these patterns until the discomfort became so great, that I knew it was time I had to do something about this. I wasn’t feeling alive, and as Doidge says, if I wanted to feel alive, I needed to learn more!

In today’s world, technology is a blessing and a curse. We are now saturated in data, we have access to an unlimited flow of information available to us in the tiny gadget that fits in our palm. Yet on the flip side, we can learn anything, anywhere and anytime. I have coaching clients now on remote islands north of Finland, Venezuela, Mexico and South Africa! There is no limit to what we can learn- from advanced spiritual practices, entrepreneurial skills, computer programming, macrame and animal husbandry! Vishen Lakhiani said in one of his recent articles that: “the trend is clearly showing that more and more people are leaning towards becoming transformational consumers, and are more likely to invest a lot more of their time improving themselves.”

This is the time to give birth to a new you. Here at The Stillness Project we put transformation at the forefront of what we do. As you can see by our new website! We felt it was time for growth, for change and for the new site to really embody more of what we are. We hope you like it! When we resist growth we will stagnate. Dr John De Martini once said “If you are green you grow, if you are ripe you rot.” Keep growing. Grow in your relationships, grow in your health, grow in your knowledge, and grow in your spiritual development.

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Tom is a meditation teacher, author, corporate speaker and personal coach. He provides one on one coaching as well as group coaching in his Zen Academy for Transformational Leadership. To contact Tom about receiving his guidance or booking him to speak at your company click here.

10 Tips On How To Heal From Depression

I was at a function last week and the discussion turned to the emotional well being of today’s teenagers. Someone in the group mentioned that they knew of 5 teenagers that had taken their lives in the last year. Adding to that I mentioned how I was also invited to assist with a high school in northern NSW that had 10 students take their lives in the last 2 years.
The sad news is this isn’t confined to teenagers. Its seeping across the whole of society. We have more affluence than we have ever had access to in the history of humankind and yet we have such unbelievable levels of depression and suicide rates. I know that statement means carries little weight though. I know what its like to be deeply depressed and contemplating if life was worth living, and having access to affluence didn’t mean a thing to me. I recall being curled up in a ball on my bed, in a dark misery and self loathing, thinking of the option of not living through this. At one point I was trying to think of all the reasons why I should be happy to help get me out of this state. I had a multiple 6 figure salary, a secure job, a beautiful home, a stable family upbringing, good relationships and on paper an ideal lifestyle. Yet I was miserable. I was deeply depressed. I contemplated not living.
Depression can hit anyone. Young, old, rich, poor. You name it. And yeh, it’s brutal when it comes knocking. There are many factors that contribute to depression as presented here from the Lifeline web site:
* Relationship problems or conflict – e.g. separation/divorce, difficult/abusive relationship
* Job loss, especially long-term unemployment
* Loneliness or feeling isolated
* Excessive drug or alcohol use
* Having another family member who has depression
* Having a serious physical illness
* Changes in how the brain functions
* Personality factors – e.g. anxiety, low self-esteem
Ultimately the end result is that there are low levels of oxytocin and serotonin in the body which leads to a feeling of sadness, depression, emptiness and disconnectedness. The good news there is a way out of that dark abyss. Admittedly there is no magic pill (some doctors may think otherwise) but with a holistic approach there is every possibility that one could come out depression and live a lighter, happier existence. Here are some steps that I took that helped me find my way out of depression:
  1. Daily meditation. This plays a huge part in me feeling happier again. When you are stressed and anxious your body doesn’t produce the happy biochemicals of serotonin and oxytocin. It will produce cortisol, and adrenaline which cuts off your happy chemicals. So the first step is to start finding ways to remove the stress response in the body and meditation will help enormously with that. You can use an app, online programs or ideally, find a qualified meditation teacher who will take you through the steps of learning to meditate.
  2. Regular exercise. This has been scientifically proven to change your biochemicals and increase your happy chemicals in your body. (Black Dog trial ) Not only is exercise good for the increase in happy biochemicals it also is a great release of stress which leads to calmer healthier body and better sleep.
  3. Yoga and stretching. Sitting in a chair most of the day and being stressed will tighten up the body and block the flow of energy through the body. Yoga and stretching will open up the body, calm the mind and realign the body back into a healthier space
  4. Avoid negative media and dark depressing movies and books. Where you attention goes it grows. So if we put our mind on negative depressing content, our mind and body will start to align with the energy of that.
  5. Get off technology and get into nature. Shutting down our phones, iPads, laptops and nature bathing is a powerful way to elevate your energy. When we are in forests, oceans, meadows…anywhere in fresh air and in the simplicity of nature, we start to sync into that local environment which will leave you elevated and enlivened.
  6. Get some natural supplements into you. The American Agriculture Association admitted that there is 60% less minerals and nutrients in our fruit and vegetables than in the 1960’s due to the amount of over farming in the last few decades. Not only that, society in general is eating less fruit and vegetables and more processed food. Boosting your food with supplements with vitamins, minerals and herbs can make a big difference to your moods. For professional advice on this seek out a naturopath in your local village or even try online.
  7. Speaking of foods, stick with more locally grown fruit and vegetables from your growers market, and eat plenty of clean organic live food possible. Avoid greasy fatty foods, processed foods, gluten, caffeine, alcohol and refined sugars where possible.
  8. Sleep! Sounds sensible however we are now sleeping on average less than we ever have. Sleep plays such an important role in healing your mind and body from the stress response and increasing your feeling of wellbeing. I’m all for the afternoon nap just for 20 mins also if you can fit one in.
  9. Open Up To Family and Friends. You may feel like withdrawing from the world, but it’s those precious relationships that make all the difference. When you share your vulnerability and connect, it deepens the bond with them and builds love. There are people in your life that care unconditionally for you. Reach out and let them in. (By the way, it’s been proven that hugs increasing serotonin and oxytocin)
  10. Be active. Sitting in a dark room or curling under your doona all day is what you might feel like doing but it’s not going to help you. Get up and get active. Start doing things. Buy some plants and plant them around your suburb. Volunteer at a local charity. Walk someone’s dog. Go to the zoo. Join your local library and read a book. Find a meetup group and join it. Mow someone’s lawn. There are plenty of things we can do each day that will help you lift out of that dark night and move forward.
Depression can not only take control of your life, but it can also affect many people around you. We can heal from depression, but it will require some action. Doing the same thing over and over again won’t bring about a different result. Keep trying new things, see what works for you. If you are suffering depression, it is recommended that you seek professional help. Have someone to talk with. There are many support facilities around the world that are there to help you through this. You don’t need to do this on your own so please reach out to someone for help.

 

Tom is a meditation teacher, author, corporate speaker and personal coach. He provides one on one coaching as well as group coaching in his Zen Academy for Transformational Leadership. To contact Tom about receiving his guidance or booking him to speak at your company click here.

How To Be An Inspiring Leader In A Turbulent World

Ken Blanchard, the successful author of over 60 books once said…

“The key to successful leadership today is influence, not authority.”

We are in changing times…

I’ve been invited to present a number of talks lately in the corporate sector, on leadership.

It seems this is a big theme of late as we are entering a very interesting time as the status quo in all areas of life is being disrupted on a daily basis and company leaders are having to keep up with the pace.

We are seeing the shared business model such as Uber and AirBnB challenge long standing business of taxis and hotels.

We have Ai and robotics which are going to potentially disrupt the employment sector, and then…

We have social media where everything is reported and very little passes public scrutiny.

Companies and their leaders are more accountable than ever before. A tweet, a Tripadvisor post, a Facebook rant can bring an entire company down very quickly.

So what does it take to be a leader in today’s world?

When I was asked to do a talk on leadership I researched some of the top leaders in the world today to see what they were doing and how they were doing it. Surprisingly the number 1 leader in a list of 50 inspiring leaders was a man that I had never heard of before! Theo Epstein.

Who is Theo Epstein?

  • He was the youngest coach of a Major League baseball team at the age of 28 when he was signed to the Boston Red Sox.
  • Within 2 years of his signing he took them to win the World Series for the first time in 86 years.
  • Not long after that, he was poached by the Chicago Cubs where he went on to win the World Series for them for the first time in 108 years!

How did this young man have so much influence over a team of players that inspired them to do something no other coach had done in 86 and 108 years?

Maybe this quote from him had something to do with it?

“When people do things they weren’t even sure they were capable of, I think it comes back to connection. Connection with teammates. Connection with organisation. Feeling like they belong in the environment.”

Theo Epstein brought together his teams and inspired them to reach new levels of capability that were always there, only it took Epstein to bring them out.

Famed musician Quincy Jones said…

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”

This is a new era of Leadership! We can no longer rule with brute force or authority. It’s a time where our leaders lead with inspiration and influence.

What makes this challenging is fallibility!

No matter how high up someone might be as a leader, they still have fallibility. Which means they will…

…screw up

…make mistakes

…do something wrong

AND it will potentially be highlighted.

Our expectation of leaders is getting higher and higher which is a good thing, as it means we ideally should be getting better leaders, but it also puts immense pressure on our leaders to meet this high standard. And it comes at a price.

There are many days where I have beaten myself up for not reaching the level of standard that I and others set for myself.

I’ve made many mistakes along the way, and after pulling myself out of the dark night I look to improve and grow from the situation.

But often it’s a slow process.

So how can leaders progress during this time of intense scrutiny and pressure?

Being vulnerable and coachable is key.

Leaders need to be open to learning and growing. To do this they need to embrace criticism and adapt accordingly.

After each of our retreats we send out a survey to our attendees asking them how we can improve what we do? I also have a fortnightly coach that is there to help me see what I can’t see and inspire me to be a better version of myself.

I believe a leader also is able to be led…A teacher is always a student.

So what are some qualities that you would seek in a leader?

Here are 12 traits that I feel as a leader we should aspire to:

  1. Vulnerable
  2. Kind
  3. Calm
  4. Consistent
  5. Focused
  6. Polite
  7. Compassionate
  8. Strong
  9. Flexible
  10. Integrity
  11. Coachable
  12. Friendly

In some way shape or form, we are all leaders. We all have a sphere of influence, whether it’s with friends, colleagues, family or clients.

It’s not about putting people on pedestals but acknowledging the leader within each and every one of us. As Tim Ferris once said:

“The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion.”

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Learn to become a conscious leader and transform yourself and those around you with personal guidance from the Founder of The Stillness Project, Tom Cronin.
This program will stretch you, expand your potential, deepen your gifts to the world, and explore ways in which you can bring your vision, mission and purpose to life. Click here to speak with Tom about your Vision, Mission And Purpose. Be a Leader at the highest level
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Why It’s Time We Stop Loving Ourselves And Looking For Love!

It’s time to change a deep-rooted program in our culture. One of our greatest quests in life is to find love and to love ourselves. This has to stop.

This is where you say: “What!? Are you crazy Tom? Why would you say such a thing??”

What does love mean to you?

For so many people there is a lot of pain and suffering connected with love. We hear words like broken-hearted, loneliness, heartache, loss, and grief. I recall myself feeling that deep emptiness, abject misery and darkness sweep over me when I felt I didn’t have any love in my life.

When love is in the form of duality, that is, there is you, and then there is love, then we are in the realm of possibility that we may not experience love. If it needs to come from someone, then we are exposed to the chance that it might not come. Or it might come, and then it might be removed. Even the idea of ‘loving yourself’ implies two things, you and love.

This perspective has been the source of so much suffering in my life and billions of people across the world. The deep aching sense of separation between who we are at our deepest level and who we perceive ourselves to be leads to a sense of loss, loneliness and separation.

Only yesterday I had a student sharing an insight that they needed to learn to love themself more. I asked them to pause and reconsider this statement. As long as there an ‘I’ that is seeking love or to be loved, then we are missing the Truth. When we strip away the duality, strip away the ‘I’ that seeks love, and we will discover that we were never NOT LOVE. It is, was and always will be YOU.

The big question is how? Love is what remains when we remove all the noise, all the emotions, all the thinking. Clearing, clearing, clearing is the task at hand. We give so much attention to thinking and feeling that it is like a noisy cacophony that drowns out what is always there – the simple presence of LOVE. Daily meditation will help strip away that noise. Transcending the field of forms and phenomena is the process of being in the essence of our love. Then when this stabilisation into our essence becomes more established that it is, was and always will be within us.

Seeking love is the illusion, BEING love is the Reality. BE LOVE.

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Our retreat experiences will support you into the exploration of your inner lovingness. We have a range of upcoming retreats in Byron Bay, Sydney, Melbourne and Bali to suit your needs. Click here to find out more.

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How To Avoid Angry Confrontations

It’s very disturbing when someone gets angry with you isn’t it? Almost immediately you feel that charge in your body, your blood pressure increases, you feel the flush in your cheeks, your heart starts pumping and adrenalin is coursing through your veins. Your first reaction is aggression. You rise up to meet your challenger and you defend your ground and force back on them with equal if not greater intensity of anger.

Now we have a collision of angry energy that usually escalates as each party unconsciously is vying for supremacy in this angry battle. Before long the entire episode, that can take literally a few minutes, can not only change your day or week, but can severely damage the relationship for good.

The good news is, it doesn’t have to be this way. There is a way to be a part of that exchange that doesn’t involve you dropping down into a negative angry space. And there are two really good reasons why it’s important that we do our best to hold our own space and not get influenced by other people’s energetic states.

Firstly, holding our own calm and compassionate space is much healthier for our body. When we change our emotional state into anger our whole body changes. We are moving into sympathetic nervous system state as your body is preparing for a battle. Your blood pressure increases, your breath rate changes, your heart starts beating faster, your blood sugar levels changes, your brain starts functioning from basic reptilian rear lobe, and your biochemistry changes as cortisol and adrenalin replace serotonin and oxytocin. Now our entire state of well-being and happiness has been removed and it could take the entire day to reclaim it back.

Secondly, when we merge our angry state with the person who is projecting their angry state onto us, we have removed any possibility of inspiring them to another alternative. There is no backing out now and what was one angry person is now two angry people. This can then have a multiplying effect as we share our new angry state with friends and family who can then also join in the angry movement. “Oh that just makes me so angry!” they may reply to your sharing of the situation. Now two becomes three and so on it goes like a nasty virus of mediocrity and negativity spreading across society. By not having autonomy and sustaining our calm non-reactive state we have removed any possibility of offering the angry person any other option. We missed the possibility of inspiring harmony and unity at a much healthier level. This is disempowering for you and not great for them.

So how do we avoid getting pulled into those situations? Well this is the challenging part that requires constant vigilance and awareness. The ego of course thrives in angry confrontation; this really enlivens the ego and gives it a sense of purpose. The ego is like woo hoo! I love this stuff! And then the ego hijacks your state. The key to preventing the ego from disempowering you is constant vigilance and awareness of what’s ego and what’s not. We need to differentiate between what is ego and what is our essential nature because if we try doing this by suppressing emotions, (a characteristic of ego) then that suppressed energy will seek a release in some shape or form at a later date.

Behind the noise of the ego is a silent witness, a quiet awareness that simply is. In Vedic teachings they call it AMness or Being. Connecting with that is done though the deep transcending meditation techniques that take the mind out of duality and into the silence, where there is no thought, form or phenomenon. Regular meditation will over time enable you to sustain the presence of this quiet awareness through even the most testing of times. Then when a situation arises, you will have your default state prevail and no ego hijacking you out of it into a reactive emotional state. From here compassion, kindness, rationale and calm will be able to prevail within you. This may help diffuse the situation quickly and offer some inspiration for your angry attacker as another alternative. If not, then the next best outcome is that instead of two angry people we only now have one.

A little disclaimer…this process takes time and practice. It’s not an overnight shift that takes place. Be easy on yourself if you find yourself getting swept away by emotional reactivity. And if in doubt, seek out some support and guidance through these situations that doesn’t involve dumping more anger onto your Mum, brother, colleague or best friend.

Oh and one more thing, sometimes we may need to respond in a firm forceful way. Certain situations might call for this. Doing this mindfully and resetting quickly back to calm after the incident will dramatically affect how you feel and it will wash you of the negative charge quickly.

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If you would like to begin your journey into meditation, try our 21 day deep meditation program called Faster Deeper Bliss. In this program, you will receive daily guidance from meditation expert, Tom Cronin, every day for 21 days. Plus you will receive 35 support videos to answer all your questions and there a few bonuses in their also that will help take your life to the next level! Find out more about this program by clicking here.

Member’s comments about our program:
“I just want to mention that Faster Deeper Bliss most definitely changed (& still is changing!) my life, so thank you” -Lisa R

“I just completed day four of my Faster Deeper Bliss meditation.  I felt as if I had an out of body experience. The peace, love and serenity just made me cry. I didn’t want that amazing feeling to end. I never meditated before, but this program seemed to be a perfect fit for me at this time in my life. Thank you so much.” -Rhonda 

How To Get Through A Dark Night Of The Soul

LightHave you recently been through a difficult time in your life, or may even be going through one right now? I have come across many friends and colleagues of late who have been experiencing something like this, myself included. 2017 was a challenging year and 2018 will be even more so it seems as we move through rapidly changing times. These dark days of suffering can be incredibly confronting, and they are experiences that all humans at some point face. The good news they will pass, and there are some things that you can do to move through them and that will help while you’re in it.
In the 16th century, a Spanish mystic called St John of The Cross wrote a book called The Dark Night of The Soul while he was in solitary confinement during the Spanish Inquisition. This was a revealing insight into his passage from the bind of his ego to the divine union (or as he calls it his “soul’s return to God”). During this process, he ventures through an emptiness beyond measure, a state of loss, desolation and darkness like never before. This emptiness is the no man’s land between the release of the bind of his egoic identity and the yet to be made union with the Divine or God. At some point, the union will be made, however it cannot be made while there is simultaneously the bond with the ego. So one must be surrendered before the other is discovered. He is neither John, the egoic identity, having already let that go, or at One with the Unbounded. Welcome to The Dark Night Of The Soul.

This is a process that we can pass through many times in our evolutionary path as we peel back layer upon layer of our false identity. Adyashanti, a revered Buddhist teacher says, “Enlightenment is a destructive process. Enlightenment is the crumbling away of untruth. It’s the complete eradication of everything we imagined to be true.” As each conditioned action, thought, or emotional pattern is dissolved and removed from your being, you can experience an identity crisis, a sense of loss from what you have become so accustomed to.

It’s a lonely, dark, hollow feeling, a feeling of being lost and empty. It’s a time where you question everything and have no idea who you are any more. Do you recall ever going through this?

Hey, well it’s ok…there is a way through this and beyond that is immense light and love. This is a transition point from one level to the next. You are levelling up, and as you leave one floor, know that soon you will arrive on another floor with more expansive views that is brighter and more appealing. As St John of the Cross says: “The endurance of darkness is the preparation for great light.”

Here are some tips to support you through a dark night of the soul:

1. Withdraw. Recluse. Pull back. Your dark night is there for a reason, it is part of your growth and it’s time for inquiry. Most of our lives we spend in enquiry, that is, looking at the world outside of us. We are distracted daily by the glamour and glitz of life. But now, it’s time to look within. It’s time to INQUIRE. So try to avoid social commitments, get off your phone, look within and as much as possible, be gentle, kind and quiet with yourself.
2. Part of this solitude is to sit in stillness and meditate. It is in these deep states of consciousness that we connect to a deeper Truth. It’s where we find the wisdom and solutions. It’s where we find our Being, beyond the conditioned identity, beyond thoughts. St John says: “It is best to learn to silence the faculties and to cause them to be still.” In these times I increase my meditations from 2 a day to 3 a day to move through the process more quickly and come out the other side.
3. Sleep. Never underestimate the power of sleep. Sleep plays in integral role in the stress releasing process that is part of the dark night. Staying up late distracting yourself on the internet, drinking, watching TV or partying is exactly that, a distraction from the purpose of the dark night, to discover more of your Truth. Sleep is a period of time for the body and mind to have reprieve, restore balance and purify. Go to bed early, have naps, sleep in.
4. Ground yourself in Nature. Go barefoot into the forest. Let your feet connect to the skin of Mother Earth. Lie on the grass and feel yourself being pulled in to her. Henry David Thoreau wrote in 1853, “As for the complex ways of living, I love them not, however much I practice them. In as many places as possible, I will get my feet down to the earth.” There is nothing as simple and yet powerful than this.
5. Nourish your body and brain with wholesome food. Often in our dark states, when we don’t feel great, we are drawn to having low-grade food and drinks. Sugary food, alcohol, fatty foods and drugs can all be used as poor forms to feeling elevated. These will be temporary and not beneficial to the process that you must and will pass through. Now more than ever your body and brain needs good quality minerals, vitamins and nutrients that will be the building blocks to your development. Your body is part of this upgrade that you are going through so look after it well.
6. Seek knowledge. I find its times like this that I devour books. Predominantly spiritual texts that are choc full of wisdom. Some of my favourites are the Yoga Vasistha, Baghavad Gita, Dark Night of the Soul, Play of Consciousness and The Science of Being and the Art Of Living. There is a Sanskrit phrase yad bhavam tat bhavati which mean ‘what we think we become’. So the nature of our mind transforms our reality and putting our mind on these profound insights and words in these books will help you through one of these dark nights.
7. Seek Counsel. There are many who have walked this path before us. They know the road and can support you as you take your turn to navigate it. Find someone that you can openly talk to. Not a friend, not a family member, someone who will non-judgementally support you through this challenging time. Be it a coach, mentor, counsellor, guru or guide. As the saying goes, “when the student is ready, the teacher will come.”
8. Know this will pass. One thing that you can absolutely be assured of, that time will pass everything. The dark night is not your punishment, it is not some random accident, it is not your life sentence… it is part of your journey to a better more enlightened experience in life. To move through it, be aware of what lies beyond. Have faith and a deep knowingness that on the other side you will feel clearer, more connected, more love, and lighter. When you know this and hold this vision, guess what? You will arrive there soon after. This is evolution and there is ONLY evolution.

You might have more tools and techniques that help you pass though these passages of darkness. Please, share them with us, we would love to hear about them. And if you feel challenged, lost or are struggling with things, there is a pathway forward and be sure to reach out to someone that will support you through it.

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Why This Woman’s Body Dissolved In Her Second Meditation

There’s no doubting the explosion in mindfulness and meditation in the last 5 years. (Yes I know it’s unusual to use the words explosion and meditation in the same sentence but its true right?!) This is a wonderful thing to see, as the world seems to be in a space where a little more calm needs to be found. But it is also creating some confusion with many seekers. It’s like when you get to a restaurant and they have 200 choices on the menu, and you just get overwhelmed with the amount of choice! Eeek, where to do I start??

So today I made a short video for you, sharing why over 20 years of researching numerous meditation techniques, that I choose to not only use myself, but also teach a meditation technique that uses mantras or sounds in it. After you watch this video you will have a deeper understanding about how to get deep quickly, so much so that in this woman’s second meditation, her body began to dissolve!

Enjoy and if you have any questions or comments please leave them below.

Click here to learn more about how to meditate with a mantra.

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